My Story is best told through this love letter to my younger self. If you’ve landed here chances are you can relate. 

Dear Poopie, 

Yeah, I know you hate that name, but it never goes away, so you learn to live with it. I’m writing this letter to you because there are some things you need to know. First of all baby girl, you are freaking amazing. I know you don’t see it yet, but one day you will. You’ll spend a long time searching outside of yourself for what can only come from within. Unfortunately, life won’t be easy, it never is. You will endure heartache, sadness, disappointment, and a whole lot of pain. You’ll even start to think that you are better off dead. That is a lie. The pills won’t save you, but God will. He’ll meet you in your darkest moment and show you there is more to your life. 

God created you with a special purpose to fulfill and the enemy is going to fight you every step of the way. But guess what baby girl, you survive. The molestation, the rape, the depression. You survive it ALL. You’ll spend a lot of time surviving, believing that survival is all you are capable of. One day you’ll discover that there’s more. Bit by bit, God will give you pieces of your puzzle and one day it will all make sense.

All that pain you survived was molding you and shaping you into the woman God needed you to be. He’s going to use the lessons you learned while going through your trials to bring healing to other women and girls. You are going to write words that speak life to the dead areas in others. You’ll say the things others are too afraid to speak. More importantly, you are going to show others the power of owning their truth. And not only that, you will create a space for women to speak their truth. 

In the midst of all of that you will meet a wonderful man and together, you will bring 4 beautiful souls into the world. They will change you and make you better. Loving them will teach you to love yourself and you will know that you are worthy. You’ll realize that your life has meaning and you don’t have to survive anymore. You will thrive as an overcomer. You will carve out a path to freedom and your light will shine so bright, you’ll show others the way out of darkness. See, I told you baby girl, you are freaking amazing and yet you’re nowhere near done. 

I want you to know I am proud of you. Your heart is so big and you give love to everyone around you. I love that about you, but I want you to save a little bit of that love for yourself. And I want you to forgive. There will be people who don’t deserve your forgiveness, but forgive them anyway. You won’t be free until you do. Most importantly, forgive yourself. You carry too much of the burden of your circumstances. You did the best you could with what you knew at the time. I want you to breathe and I want you to smile. You deserve to smile. I want you to know I love you and I carry you with me every day. You’re safe now. 

Love,

The Woman You Become.